Friday, April 2, 2010

Coming out of my dyslexic shell!

Last night's workshop was really helpful and made me think about my learning and how to expand it.

Although the class was on erotica it went through some more basic tasks about description.  I have to admit to feeling rather uncomfortable when put under time pressures and then reading out what you had come up with.  Fortunately I only had to do it once but listening to the others in the group and the amazing amounts they had come up with in a short amount of time was an eye opener.  Partly it made me realise the amazing volume of talent out there in just a small room.  It also made me feel momentarily discouraged and in awe.  It also made me realise that it is almost like my brain is in two sections.  My dyslexia was more on show in that pressured situation.  I have had a habit for many years when I can't remember the word I want.  When I can't remember rather than stop writing I always put a _________? on the page and then come back to it later.  I did that a couple of times last night and not given the time to think I had to fill them in with a substitute word.  The other part of my brain is more free flowing always coming up with ideas but I find it difficult expressing these thoughts and images.    Even though these kind of go against each other given the time and effort I always come up with something.  It is just slightly more difficult and I plod along with these things rather than having an evident prowess.

For a moment last night it made me feel like I might go back into my shell and pass up on my ambitions like I may have done in the past.  That moment quickly passed though as I know that identifying my weaknesses and working to strengthen them can only be of benefit.  It has made me realise that any opportunities like this are going to be of benefit and I need to embrace them even if I don't feel that comfortable partaking.  I plan to look into more learning opportunities like this either on-line or in group settings.

Before that though I am determined to get one large project completed so am presently concentrating on the playwright.

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